Jeremy Tharp Pennant Logo Musician, songwriter, aspiring visionary. Share » Tharp Me!

Song: Running From The Law

Lyrics:

I'm a vampire

I once made love to a snail
It was real sticky and stuff
When I was done we cuddled on the bed
Til I said I've had enough
Go away
I only wanted you for love
It wasn't about emotional attachment
Go away
I wanted you for love
And not the kind of love that you're thinking of
But the kind that mainly means male and female having sex

Oh my God
Oh God
God it's so ... feels so good

Apparently the snail didn't get the hint
She came back to my house and she offered me a mint
But I'm allergic
I'm allergic to things that make your breath smell better

God
Oh my God ... oh it's so good
Yeah yeah
Oh my God ... oh oh oh

Tonight I hooked up with a squirrel
He had some a fixation with my nuts
Mighta been a human hairy girl
Or something of that such
Well anyway the snail she showed up
She saw me and the squirrel feeling each other up
And well
It was ... it was crazy
Her shell got all red and hazy
Oh my God
She took a knife
Oh my God
And she stabbed the squirrel throught the heart
Then she ran out of the door
She called her a whore
She called the cops
And now I'm running from the law

Running from the law
Hope I don't fall
Let them catch me
Cause running from the law is illegal and against the law
But if I'm running from the law the law doesn't apply to me

I see a gas station on the left
In the mirror my chin has a cleft
But it's not important right now cause I'm running from the law
So I'll stop and buy a Bawls
Guarana Guarana Bawls Guarana
Keep me up all night so I can run from the law and not get caught
I should probably buy gas while I'm here too
So my car doesn't run out
Oh my God
Filling up my car
Oh my God
With gasoline
Oh ... it's so good
Oh my God
The security camera
Oh God
The security camera sees me
Oh my God
The gas station dude's calling the Police
Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh
I hear sirens in the distance
Oh Oh
I hear sirens coming for me
Gotta run from the law cause they won't ignore me
I was framed
A squirrel died in my arms when the snail stabbed her in the heart
Oh it was sabotage
Sabotage
Sabotage
Sabotage
Sabotage
Sabotage
Sabotage
Sabotage
I didn't kill her
I was trying to fill her
Oh that's what you get for a one-night-stand

I'm coming up to the border of Canada
Canada ... Canada
But I just realized
There's no way I'm gonna get into Canada
My this was a stupid idea
My only hope
Is to run to Mexico
There's only one problem--I don't speak Dutch

So I enlisted the help of a a Dutch tour guide
Who's gonna help me get myself to Mexico so I can be free
Me oh me oh my oh me
The cops are coming after me
Driving down the ... driving down the highway

I hear the sirens
I hear the sirens
Through the silence there comes those sirens

It's getting dark
I see a hotel on my right
I think me and my Dutch guide will stop for the night
So we're chilling in the hotel room
We flip on the booby-tooby to see what's on
And it's CSI: Miami
Turns out it's the story about me
And my Grammy
No, not me and my Grammy
But I made you think that didn't I
Yes
Heh, I can be pretty tricksy sometimes
So anyway, they have this guy on here
He's a horrible actor and he looks nothing like me
And he murders the squirrel
I didn't murder the squirrel
I was framed by a one-armed snail
So I'm sitting there watching the show
And I didn't get to see the ending
Oh my life has gotten so strange and pitiful
Cause a maid knocked on the door and she's like
"Do you need towels?"
And I'm thinking to myself at the time
These things just won't give up
"Why the heck would I need a towel?"
All my world is gone away
But it's right about that time that she stabbed me in the colon
Gone away
And I needed a towel
So I said "Yeah I'll take towel"
All my world
So she handed me a towel and she left
All my world
And I cleaned up the blood
Is gone
I figured this probably wasn't a good place to hide out
All my world is gone
So me and my Dutch tour guide
All my world
We headed back out on the road
All my world is gone
Running for Mexico so I could be free
Is gone

All my world is gone from me tonight
All my world
All my world is gone away from me and life is nothing no more

I'm approaching the Mexican border
All my world
All my world
Oh my God my car's running out of gas
I see sirens in the distance
The lights are flashing
They're gonna catch me
So me and my Dutch guide hop out of the car
We start running really really really fast for the border of Mexico
And whattya know we're right about on the line
Until the cops pulled out their guns
And shot me through
I'm dying
I'm dying
I'm dying
Oh my God
I'm dying
Oh my God
Oh my God
I'm dying
Oh my God
I'm dying and then a hand came out of the sky
I think it was Jesus Christ
He touched me on the head and I came back to life

I got up and ran into Mexico
I love Jesus he didn't eat my mom
I got up and ran into Mexico
I love Jesus he didn't eat my mom
I love Jesus Christ
I love Jesus too
Jesus is my brother and he loves me but not in a good way
Jesus
He didn't eat my mom

Praise the Lord
PRAISE THE DAGGONE LORD
I made it into Mexico now I'm a free man
I started going to church but decided that wasn't for me
I'm out again on a one-night-stand with a man and a woman and another man 
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